Love, Hate, and Forgiveness

There are three thing that all people know but might not understand. Love, hate, forgiveness. I have three points and I will cover all three in the next couple paragraphs.
     Love is probably the most comlex feeling us humans will feel.  Love is not something you can force on someone, love isn't even a feeling you can influence. Love is a pain, it is happiness, love is every emotion you can feel but knowing that it is the right decision. When a mother has a child, that is true love. She feels fear, she experiences pain, she feels the doubtfullness of her strength her child, but she knows that she loves that child she just delivered to the world and knows that she would jump between them and any danger that comes along. If you are not scared of what you have, or don't feel like you can equal their greatness, that is love.
     What is hate? Is it disliking something? opposite of love?
I think hate is a useless feeling, an over used word.Just because you disagree with something, and dislike something, it does not mean you hate. Hate is one of the strongest words you can use. When you tell someone you hate them, you can not take that back. You are telling them that they are the worse thing in the world. They are the bottom of your list and that you don't think they should exist. I can not bring myself to tell someone I hate them, it is not fair for them and I do not have that power to belittle that person.
     Forgiveness is the hardest emotion\action for any human to use. when someone has done you wrong or hurt your feelings, most of the time they will ask for your forgiveness. Humans will always want to forgive but don't know the proper way to forgive. I know from past experiences when I said I forgave them for what they did, i didnt. I thought I wanted to, I meant to forgive them, I even tried forcing myself to. Forgiveness is not an act you can decide when it happens.Foregiveness is an act that takes time and trust. Overtime that wrong dueing that your friend did will pass and will eventually be over, but the hurt feelings and the pain that it caused will last longer. Don't let the wrong dueng take over you, don't let it be the reason you "hate".  Don't lie to that person and tell them that you forgave them when you still feel that pain. Be honest with that person and tell them that you are hurt and tell them it will take time to forgive and will need to rebuild that trust.
     I know this was not that well written, but hey, I am on lunch and using my phone. My next blog will be motivation and motivating. Thank you all for your  support and thanks for being here.

Musically Yours,
Shelden.

When will it end?

      I am not sure where I am going to go with this so hold ont. What is wrong with the world today? people will blame the kids, the neighbors, the whites, the blacks, the cops, the politicians, but what I see is that you are the problem with the world. Yes you. The person sitting behind the computer, phone, etc, mouthing people just to start a fight or posting facts that are not true. Sure I know, I am behind my computer right now typing this and people will call me hypocritical for it, but eh, who cares, right? One thing that makes me different from you is, I am not posting bogus facts to tear people down or videos of cops making "terrible" decisions, I am here to try to get a point across..
    We need to stop pointing fingers and start realizing that this is everyone's fault. We are at a point in time that the world is not safe. I know that the world has never been safe, but we are having to many innocent lives ended due to scared men and just ignorance. Eleven kids got mugged when they went out and played their PokemonGo game, multiple police officer being shot when they did a basic traffic stop, people getting shot because they didn't comply with the officer during a stop. What is going to make people quit trying to harm people. What will make people want to actually better their lives and not make these stupid decisions. It is not that hard. One simple smile, one simple yes sir/ma'am, or maybe just ignore something that you disagree on and go on with your day. I promise you, most people on the internet do not care about your opinion. I catch myself all the time, especially on Facebook, wanting to post a mean comment because someone disagrees with my beliefs, and sometimes I do break and I do post it. I will get so mad or disgusted that someone actually believes what they just posted and I will start typing and post my opinion. At that moment I feel stupid. I feel like I am a terrible person because I am trying to tear down their belief and what makes me big enough to do that. Nothing. There opinion is just as good if not better than mine. Their belief might not be true but neither is mine.
      Okay  i want to talk about police side and then I will end my post.
Some cops join the force for the thrill of it and the fast pace of the job but most join the force to serve and protect the citizens. Here is the deal, say you get pulled over by an officer that did join for the thrill, don't give him a reason to feel the thrill. I highly doubt that you want to leave the scene in a body bag or send someone home in one, and if you do want to shoot a cop just think about this. You will not be a role model, most people will hate and despise you, some people might come after you and put you through the same sentence. You have now just turned someones family upside down and they might not be able to recover from it. The male officer you just shot will not be able to come home to his wife or kids. The wife will go through the worst of the situation. The first three months she is going to think that it's not true or that it can't be true with a strong realization that her husband will never be seen again besides the picture that she sleeps next to. She is going to cry every night as she falls asleep and every morning over her loss, this can go on for 12 to 24 months.That kid will no longer see his father and will have to suffer watching his mother cry because a decision that you made. That female officer you shot and can't go home has now left her husband at home with a child. That husband will not handle the situation well and will probably pick up the alcohol. Having a kid that loses a father or mother will give that kid a higher risk to drug and alcohol abuse, will double that kids chance to commit suicide, and has a higher rate of doing criminal activities. right there you have ruined three lives because of the decisions you have made. Look at the other way, say you got shot, was there a reason? If you say no then you are an idiot and get off my page. Evaluate how you act when you speak to an officer, were you being respectful? were you using foul words ever other word? Were you reaching inside of your pants when the officer states to keep your eyes in sights? Did you run or fight the officer when he apprehended you? If you get stopped, you don't have to argue with the police, if he writes you a ticket and you know it was a false reasoning, take it to court and win it. I think that is a better solution then shooting a police officer just because you were going five over the speed limit. If you get shot and killed by a police officer your family will mourn you, your friends will miss you, but the people that didn't know you will think of you as a criminal. What a way to go down.
         I don't know about you but I like most people, even if they disagree with me, or acts like a jerk, and I don't want to see people dead just because they have a different opinion then me and if I did I should not be allowed out in the public. Why can't we discuss our opinions instead of shooting people down because of theirs? When will this end?

Not sure

   I am at that point where i am tired of listening to everyone complain about all this stupid stuff. All of this social media trending crap that goes around and people think what they say will fix issue. I make post now and then but I know that it won't change anything, I just want to point out the ignorance and stupidity in fighting online through social media. Just look, everyone was throwing fits and saying the mom should be charged, the zoo keepers should be charged, and how this was the worst thing that could ever happen. It has been two weeks and guess what, everyone that was hating on people and posting nasty comments have already forgotten that it happened and now onto the next Facebook fight. Who didn't forget is the family that it affected, the kid that got to go home to his family, and the zookeepers that had to make that decision. There was no decision to be made. If we, humans will chose or risk another human beings life for an animals, then we have failed as a country. I just don't understand how people can think that way. Here is what I think we should do;
 Get over yourselves and actually try making a difference. Stop trolling people and actually do research, stop hating and start donating, stop complaining about your life and make someone else's life better.
 This got off topic but this is for mostly for me. keep hatin since that is pretty much all you people know. Once again have a nice day and have fun Facebook fighting!
  Musically yours,

So called Christians

   Okay here goes another ranting post and probably won't be as long and will probably offend people.
   Okay my problem I am having today is the so called "christians". The I think gays and Trans are terrible and are an abomination so I must judge them and treat them diffrently because it's against my religion.

Everyone who is arrogant in heart is an abomination to the Lord; be assured, he will not go unpunished.

Proverbs 28:9

  I am pretty sure calling gays and Trans an abomination is the the same as stating that they are below us and makes us arrogant. The definition of being arrogant is having or revealing an exaggerated sense of one's own importance or abilities.
   We aren't better than them if we think we are. Just because it is against your religion doesn't mean we can hate them or treat them diffrently.
      Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

1 John 4:11

So if you don't show love and compassion to others because they are different from you, practice other religions, or have a different sexual preference, then you are not Christian. You are one of those people who claim to love God and just goes through the motions when people are around but still sin when you are by yourself.
       Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’

1 John 1:8-10
 
    So before you claim to hate these people or share a page stating you are Christian and disagree with what they do, remember, God will make the final decision and judge them. That's not your job.

What is wrong with the world.

   Okay, so this will be sounding a little ranty and there will be a few typos, since I am using my phone.
   What is wrong with the world? Are we seriously this arrogant and think that we are better than everyone else. Who cares if he is black, who cares that she is mexican, who cares that he/she gay, bi, or transgender. I don't care and you want to know why? Because I am not them. I am my own person and live my own life. I swear that some people wake up and are like, "I'm going to make fun of this gay kid in class today." OR " I'm going to go to school today and shoot this person because there not my race. GET OVER YOURSELF. No one cares about your opnion, this isn't middle school anymore. If you have a problem with someone because their beliefs or race, you have a serious problem and need to go to a mirror, look at yourself for five minutes, and think how stupid you are being. (Might take longer if you are less intelligent then most)
     If you spend half the time worrying about your own life instead of complaining about everyone else, you might become something great, or actually make an impact in life.
    I read up on news articles around the world every now and then. It tears me apart. People trying take guns away, people wanting to make $15 at McDonalds, people shooting police just because they are police. I work with police everyday, and there is not a justified  reason to shoot a police officer. You speed, officer flights his lights on, and you keep driving. I hope he totals your car. You charge an officer, expect to get shot, I would shoot to. You do stupid stuff expect to get punished.
  I guess what I'm trying to say in this rant is that we need help and you guys need to stop being so stupid and grow a pair. I am disappointed in you America.

Just Writing

It's been one of those days.. Where everything feels rushed, but time is moving slow.. I'm walking past people I know and don't know, not acknowledging them. It is just one big blur of people and thoughts.
Is There a way to get out of this way, this bind of confusion? I'm suppose to be happy, I am happy.. I think. I'm just stuck in this trance that I can't fathom anything. I force myself to do so much, to make people be pleased of me.. I think I just need to stand up and do what I want in life and not what others want.I know that is probably a bad thing to say, but what would you do in this instance? The earliest I've been home from school was... I don't fully know, maybe six, six thirty. That was once or twice. Saturdays are sometimes my day off, but I haven't had a Saturday off for a long time. It's just so busy... Track, the play, the musical, choir, and band.. I just want to give up on half of it and just crawl into a little hole and sleep...

Life isn't all bad though. I have great friends and family. This support me, to an extent. They expect a lot out of me. Friends expect me to do great and believe I have so much potential of being great and successful. Which is a little ironic because I don't try in stuff. I put very little effort into most the thing I do, I just start out naturally better then most. I do try to be the person that people want, but It's difficult while you are in high school. I am nice to people, I don't lie when people ask me a question, I just speak what my mind thinks of. Unless it's like a terrible thing then, i usually keep it quiet. Like my preacher says, "Say what you mean, and mean what you say." I love that quote. It is very true.

So, I do not have much more time to type, so I am going to start to close this out. If anyone ever reads this, I doubt anyone will, just know that I'm not unhappy, I am not a bad person. I'm just sometimes confused and stuck in a daze. Just writing this little blog made me feel so much more. . . . real. Feels like I'm not hiding anything. The subject might be jumpy in spots, or the whole thing, but I was just typing what was on my mind. Some times it feels like I'm not good enough to be here on earth. Okay that's an exaggeration, feels like I don't deserve some of the friends and some of the belief people have in me. If you ever feel like you can't go on, or you don't feel like you have someone to trust, message me, or find me, I'll listen and try to help with whatever is troubling you..

                                                                                                 Musically Yours,
                                                                                                   Shelden Walker